How To Get Out of Your Head

From time to time, I go through phases where I seem to be all up in my head. There have been many times where overthinking keeps me from taking action on things that I know I will enjoy doing or even things I know I need to do. This even happens when it comes to things I know I can take care of with my eyes closed! But acknowledging this flaw helps me to overcome it by always looking for ways to get out of my head. I thought I’d share some of the things I do to get out of my head, in case anyone may be struggling with overthinking, and therefore not taking actions!

1. Write down your thoughts
2. Make a list of what you need to do to accomplish the task at hand
3. Promise yourself a specific reward for taking action
4. Start with one small step
5. Keep things as simple as possible
6. Talk things over with someone you trust
7. Ask for help if you need it
8. Remind yourself why you made this task a priority in the first place
9. Imagine how it will feel when you’ve taken action
10. Just do it!

My favorite one is #10: Just do it! Not to copy from the well-known athletic wear company that carries the slogan, but it’s just short, simple and to the point! Sometimes, you really need to just stop hesitating, throw caution to the wind a little, and just do it! Whatever “it” is! Done is usually better than perfect. And perfect is nearly impossible. So might as well just do it!

Your turn, as I’m always looking for tips! What are some things you do or ways you get out of your head and out of your own way?

Impromptu Break

For the past month or so, I haven’t posted anything on my blog. And I barely posted and interacted on social media in general. For some reason, I just felt… blocked. Each time I tried to post something, it just didn’t feel right. I know what you might be thinking, and trust me, I’ve thought it too: “Just do it!” Right? But I’m big on energy. The energy didn’t feel right. And so, to preserve my own energy, I decided to just take a break from the online world.

It was a much needed transition from 2020 into 2021.

Often, we act like things will automatically change when the year changes, or when the month changes, or when the season changes. And that’s not truly the case, which is why new year’s resolutions often fail. Small, gradual lifestyle changes are much more likely to stick. And these lead to greater, more profound changes that will really make a nice impact on your life. This year, instead of coming up with resolutions that I know I won’t stick to, I’ve been thinking about what I want to experience and how I want to impact people. And the little changes I can implement here and there to help me reach those goals.

A few things I will do my best to commit to are…

Consistency. This one is difficult, as a full-time employee and single mother. Getting anything else done, besides working for my regular paycheck and taking care of my little one, is a struggle more often than not. My number one priority is my son, and I don’t want to take away from quality time with him during the very important toddler years. He’s learning and growing so much everyday! Lately, we have been working on ways to keep him happily occupied while I take care of other tasks.

New Content. When I first started this blog, it was really just a place where I’d upload travel pics, random thoughts, poems, and even recipes. I ended up deciding to stick with mainly poetry and travel pics. But I would like to try expanding my blog and test out a wider range of topics. Feedback is always appreciated so please let me know what you like and what you want to see more of!

Interaction. In the past few months, I’ve come to learn that the blogging world mostly consists of bloggers encouraging, uplifting and supporting each other! I love the community energy and will do my best to engage more. 💗

Confidence. I’ve been doing self-healing work, acknowledging my shadows, and letting go of the need for perfection. Throughout my life, I’ve dealt with bouts of low self-esteem and perfectionism (a terrible combo). So I aim to just flow more freely and openly going forward. One baby step at a time though 😅

Anyway…

That’s an update on where I’ve been. Not missing in action, just working on my energy. I love you all and can’t wait to share positive vibes!

If you’ve got any tips or advice for any of my commitments, or any feedback in general, I’m all ears!

Family Roles During Holidays!

Does each person in your family have a specific unofficial role during holidays and other special occasions? Because in mine, we pretty much all have a role! 😅

I grew up always wanting to be a lot like my mom, so I’d be in the kitchen with her watching her cook every day. We’d bake different desserts together. She’d let me try my own thing sometimes, too. Inventar, as the Latin mommas say!

And if you didn’t catch on, my mom’s unofficial official role was head chef for all our special occasions. Why? It’s simple. She loves to cook. She cooks with lots of love and it’s obvious once you smell, see and taste her amazing dishes!

But while she cooks all the main dishes for all occasions, it’s up to me to select and create dessert! It’s not my only role, but it’s probably my favorite! 🤷‍♀️ Let’s walk through the different things expected of each person in my immediate family during a holiday. Christmas, to be specific!

Gift Shopping

This one’s on everyone pretty much. But more often than not, everyone is asking me for help picking out gifts for everyone! I don’t mind, as I love the feeling of satisfaction when someone opens a gift I helped pick out and they actually love it! I think I’m pretty good at shopping! My dad somehow gets dragged to all the stores too, so I’d say main shoppers are my dad and I. Sorry Dad!

Food

My mom tends to go all out in the kitchen for holidays, but she doesn’t do it alone! My brother’s wife is also an amazing cook, and sometimes, I can barely tell the difference between her food and my mom’s! And that’s a big deal! My mom typically does the main dishes, while my sister-in-law does the sides. And as mentioned previously, I take care of dessert! My dad always sets the table though!

Entertainment

For just about any occasion, we can count on my brother to provide the music as well as what we watch on TV. Does he take suggestions though? 😬 If you’re nice?

Beverage

This one’s on my dad, brother and sister. And it’s usually a last minute trip to the liquor store! Haha But typically it’s my dad or sister pouring drinks, or just being the main ones drinking!

Gift Wrapping

Maybe it’s because of my attention to detail, but for some reason, everyone’s gifts end up in my closet for me to wrap up…I don’t mind though! The fun part is I end up not labeling any gifts in an obvious way, so only I know what’s what!

Playing with the Kids

Kids make holidays even more special, especially Christmas, where you get to see them smile when they open up their presents! But they also need entertainment! I’m really good at keeping them (my nephews and my son) occupied, but my sister and my sister-in-law are great as well!

Wrapping Up the Night

At the end of a great holiday, comes time to clean up and put things away. Everyone tries to pitch in, but inevitably my mom and sister-in-law take care of the kitchen disproportionately, while the rest of us take care of all the other things.

I sometimes wonder what kind of roles my son and my nephews will take on in our family, as they get older. 🤔

What about you? Do you have a certain role in your family, especially during the holidays? I’d love to know if your family is similar to mine or totally different! 💗

Everyday is a Holiday, a poem

From the day you were born

And almost 9 months before

I knew that I’d love you

Forever and more

From your cute little curls

To your ten little toes

The way that you hug me

Really warms up my heart

The smile on your face

Is all that I need

I never imagined I could love someone this much

And I never thought I could be so loved in return

So this holiday season, I give thanks to the Universe, Source, God, etc.

For everyday is a holiday

Because I have you in my arms

Childhood Holiday Memories

Flashback to my childhood… my whole extended family gathered together on Christmas eve. Afro-Latino party music playing in the background. Sometimes merengue, sometimes salsa, sometimes bachata. Always the right mood.

Kids all running around, trying to not get in the adults’ way. Playing together. Joking together. Catching up in the way kids do.

Dinner served. Drinks served. Jokes laughed at. People dancing. People being outrageously loud.

Kids waiting anxiously until midnight, so we could start opening gifts. Quickly getting sleepy. Going home at 1 or 2 in the morning. The cold, winter chill in your face.

Quick change into warm PJs. Snuggle up in bed with a cozy comforter. Lights out and off to dream worlds.

Wake up early in the morning, open up any remaining gifts that were left at home. Mom fries empanadas. Hot chocolate to wash it down.

A relaxing day at home with mom and dad and siblings. No school. No work. Nothing important to do except to be in each other’s company.

These are the memories I have of Christmas, growing up in New York with all my family around. Things may not be exactly the same, but I’m fond of the memories and fond of newer memories and traditions. I hope my son can look back at his childhood in a similar way.

What are your holiday traditions? Will you pass them on to your children (if you have any or plan to have any)? What are your fondest memories of holidays growing up? I want to know! 💗

31 Random Things I Love 💖

1. When my baby giggles and then squeezes me tightly. 👶🏻

2. Actually understanding something in a new language I’m learning. 📙

3. When someone understands exactly what I’m saying even though I’m overcomplicating what I’m trying to say. 🙌

4. Finding a new song that expresses exactly what someone makes me feel. 💞

5. Being able to share that song with that someone. 🎶

6. Good night calls and good morning texts. 📱

7. Making a dessert for people I love and watching the joy on their face as they eat it. 🍰

8. The way my eyebrows look once I get them done (myself) after growing them out for a while. 🤨

9. Floating around in the ocean water, when the sun and the water are both warm. 🌊

10. Meeting new interesting people, even if I never see them again. 👥

11. When I look good in a selfie with minimal effort. 🤳

12. When my best friends understand the exact meaning of any of my facial expressions. 😏

13. When a tarot reading confirms something I already kind of knew. 🃏

14. My toe nails, freshly polished. 👣

15. When I complete a craft project smoothly! 📐

16. Creating a playlist full of songs that match one of my moods. 🎼

17. Good, cheesy, flavorful pizza. 🍕

18. My bed, just made with freshly laundered sheets. 🛌

19. Sleeping with a fan on. ❄

20. The flickering of candlelight in a dark room. 🕯

21. The scent of fresh cut flowers. 💐

22. Everything about autumn. The colors, the air, the foods, the festivities. 🍂

23. When my little one just wants to snuggle with me at the end of the day. 👩‍👦

24. Long weekends at home, relaxing! 🛋

25. The butterfly feelings when talking to a crush. 🦋

26. An ice cold drink on a hot day! 🥤

27. Writing…anything! ✍

28. Finding a new series to watch, and being hooked on it from the start. 📺

29. When the exact outfit you want to wear fits perfectly! 👗

30. Freshly trimmed-down finger nails. 💅

31. Perfect lighting to fit the mood. 💡

Like a beached whale…

…but not really.

The year is coming to a close. It’s been real interesting. I became a mother and had an introductory crash course on what life has really been like for my own mother all these years. Motherhood isn’t easy. You miss out on a lot of sleep and self-care. But it’s also very rewarding. The smiles, the cuddles, the coos, the giggles. The fact that when baby is cranky all he wants is mommy. 😇

I have no regrets. I love my baby. Sometimes, I may feel like I can’t get as much done as I would like to. But it doesn’t matter. As long as I take care of the things I need to do in order to care for my little one. He’s the center of my world. And nothing matters more than his well-being, health and happiness. 👩‍👦

 

New Smyrna Beach, Florida. October 2019